Forgiveness

"My heart felt like a volcano mommy, so I had to go to sleep to feel better."  Oh. My.  Kyle stole a piece of gum from a store on Saturday.  I knew something was wrong the minute we got in the car and I turned to do my usual double-check of Kyle's seatbelt.  Kyle was pale and looked like he might throw up at any second.  The words actually thundered in my head, "Ask him what he has!"  Oh. My.  His little hand unfurled and there it was - a piece of sour apple gum in the wrapper.  The tears started immediately.  The sorrowful wailing.  A calm, rational voice (was it really mine?) telling him that we had to go back.  He had to admit to another grown up what he had done.  He would be punished.  Not only by us, but maybe by the store.  It was a long walk across that parking lot.  He was sobbing and begging me to help him tell what had happened.  Luck was with us, there was an older employee right inside the door.  I think she knew what was coming the minute we walked in the door.  He told her.  Oh. My.  She started to cry a little over this heartbroken little boy, but she did not say, "It's okay."  She did not say, "It's alright."  She did say, "Thank you for telling the truth."  She glanced at me with those mommy tears in her eyes echoing my own and nodded at me.  We left.  It was a quiet ride home, with a lot of sniffing and tissues for both of us.  He told his dad what happened and went to his room.  The sobs didn't last long.  He slept.  Slept some more.  When I went to wake him up, that's what he said.  "My heart felt like a volcano mommy, so I had to go to sleep to feel better."  I am so very glad his heart hurt, because I don't think I could have stood it if it hadn't.